LaQuwan Frazier
Mark Jacobs is a lawyer and community activist.
LaQuwan Frazier
By Mark Jacobs
The family isn't sure who shot LaQuwan Frazier last Saturday night in Southfield, and they're not sure it even matters at this point.
He's still gone and there's still a hole in their hearts. Another young black life cut short by violence. Another family left devastated by a sudden and senseless murder. LaQuwan, 20, was literally sitting at a kitchen table when a bullet came through the window and ended his life, his sisters sitting next to him.
I witnessed the family members in their full grief today at LaQuwan’s funeral in Detroit. His uncle, Rev. Kenneth Flowers is a friend who had the painful task of eulogizing his beloved nephew. Rev. Flowers has conducted more than his share of funerals, but this one tore especially deep in his heart. Rev. Flowers loved Laquawan dearly, and his words exposed the deep and raw pain in his heart.
“I’m pissed off,” Rev. Flowers tearfully told the hundreds of mourners, about half of whom were young folks. “We’ve got to find a way to stop killing each other.”
LaQuwan’s father tried to eulogize his son, but could hardly muster the strength, other than to quietly utter, “This hurts so bad.”
'Still a baby'
A few cousins spoke of LaQuwan’s “goofy smile” and how he was just making plans in his life. “He was still a baby,” his young cousin cried out, “People, we’ve got to wake up. This is hell down here.”
And now LaQuwan’s death has become part of a sad statistic. Another African American man's life cut short. I sat there in the front row of the Greater New Mount Moriah Missionary Baptist Church on Owen Street, near Woodward Avenue, in Detroit and stared at the open casket and experienced the loud, palpable grief throughout the room.
In the hour and one-half funeral I got a small sense of who this young man was and what he meant to his family and friends.
But I also realized for police detectives, LaQuwan Frazier is not the young guy with the goofy smile, but the name on a brand new homicide investigation file.
Funerals like LaQuwan’s – as horrible and gut-wrenching as it was – tragically play out all the time in the Detroit area and all around the country.. We read about homicide deaths of young people and it’s easy to become immunized to the reality of it. Our eyes sometimes even glaze right over the stories.
'A powerful reminder'
But for those who are mostly untouched by homicide, a funeral like LaQuwan’s is a powerful reminder that moments like these are just part of normal life for many people, as if these kinds of nightmares are on a perpetual loop, just replaying over and over again. And I’m sure it never gets easier.
Rev. Flowers implored the young people to look to their faith, to turn away from violence and not seek retaliation. “That only leads to more violence, and more funerals and lifetime prison sentences.” He’s smart enough to know it wasn’t a time for a speech on gun reform, that the pain of the moment made the case for him.
Near the end of the funeral the large family gathered at the casket for a final goodbye. Many of them wore t-shirts with LaQuwan’s picture on the front and the letters “RIP” on the back. But under “RIP” was a new definition with a simple plea – “Reverse It Please.”
It was the most profound message of the day.